Somewhere In Btwn Sleep Training and Not Sleeping
Okay, so let’s be clear, I’m either a chronic oversharer or I share nothing. There is no in between with me - so, today I’m going to let it all out. A few moms asked me “how do I make it all happen?” and honestly, sis, I don’t. However, I do have a pretty consistent schedule that keeps me from treading the line of half crazy. Before I had Jonas, everything was easy. I could come home from grad school and/or work and cook dinner, study, spend time with Justin and mind my business, but after having kids, I realized there was just no way I could be “me” and also have a house that ran like it’s supposed to.
With Jonas, I was the mom who never slept because not only was I nursing until he was one, but I also had mom anxiety because if I slept, was he going to die, oh, and because I wanted to finally watch tv and look at Instagram AND I just could not get the hang of those God forsaken sleep training schedules. It was so hard for me to just figure it out - (claps between each syllable here) ‘I will not lie to you.’
By the time Jonas turned one, we figured out how we could get into the flow of things. Because I had just gotten back into working full time, I wanted to have more than just the evenings with my son, so I was at the office by 6:00a so that I could be off work and back home with Jonas by 4:00p each day. That meant my day looked a little like this: 4:15a - wake up and get dressed, 5:00a - kiss Jonas before I leave, 5:15a - leaving for work, 6:00a-2:00p - work, 4:00p - pick Jonas up, 5:00p-7:00p - dinner/hang out with family, 7:45p - bed, bath, bottle, book, 8:00p - Jonas in bed, 8:30p - I am KNOCKED OUT!
However, this all changed once the lime and the coconut Pandemic hit. We were all home and navigating a new world. Luckily, my siblings were with me so I had extra help with Jonas for a few months while trying to figure out working from home and having to focus on balancing two worlds - my family and my work. It was a little difficult at first because I was holding on to a lot of mom guilt trying to make it all work, but we eventually got the hang of it. I’d bring my computer wherever I needed to in the house to be close to Jonas, meet my deliverables and then have the rest of the day to hang out with family. But, this didn’t work forever.
After having Jamisen Clover, I started to really feel like the walls were caving in once returning to work. I wanted to figure out a system that really worked for us and honestly am still tweaking it. But it looks a little something like this - the kids get up every day by or before 7:30a. We use the potty, change diapers, wash up, get dressed and then head downstairs for breakfast. After breakfast, Jonas goes to half day program at a church nearby, Clover goes as well twice a week. I come home and work for the time they are there because let’s be real, this is best time for me to have a solid focus on anything. I pick them up from school and we have lunch together before they go down for nap from 2:00p-4:30p. On the days that Clover is home, we have a sitter come and teach her (mostly learning through play) and care for her while I work. After nap time, the kids get up and we hang out together until I cook dinner and then we eat together as a family and it’s time to get ready for bed. The kids go down by 8:30p each evening.
Then the party starts. This is when I finally get to wind down and mind my business - and that looks different ways on different days. Most days, I’ve created the habit where after self care, I extend the self care by reflecting. I read Live in Grace, Walk in Love, by Bob Goff and answer the daily question in my journal. I then write a little bit about the day and how I’m feeling at that particular time. Okay, and here’s a deep, dark, secret - I’m obsessed/addicted to reality TV. Probably because of withdraws of a former life before grace, where I had lots and lots of personal drama and now no longer do (praise God), so I kinda get the fix from watching The Bachelor, RHOP, RHOA, RHOSLC, Big Brother, The Challenge, Survivor, not going to continue, but the list does go on. Oh, and tons of soap operas because I’ve gotta get my stories in. So - this is what the “me time” part of my day is filled with, watching tons of tv - and the “me time” happens when the kids are sleep and after the hubby falls asleep.
So, yeah, there’s that. I don’t get it all done, and I’m not super perfect with the way the day looks all the time, but I try to get it done and I try to give myself a little grace while I do it.
